Broke Christmas

Whoever did that survey that found that poor people are happier than rich people didn't bother to ask my opinion. I guess there is a difference between poor and broke. Poor means you never had anything to begin with, broke means you had it but lost it. I guess that's why I'm sulking a bit...I'm missing what "used to be".

The boat industry took a dump last year and Aaron's been out of work for almost 2 months. He's started a printing company, but like any new business it's going to take a while to get off the ground. He's working long hours and trying his best for our family. I will always love that characteristic about him. There is not one person I know that can out-work him. Until things get going, we just have to hold on as tight as we can. With many tears and feelings of failing my son, I started back to work part-time at my old job. My boss has been kind enough to let me bring Everett. (we'll see how long that lasts...) It's insane to think about how much has changed for us in the last year.

Everything is scaled back to practically zero and it's almost time to kick into survival mode. I'm surveying my home and making a list of what I can sell. I suppose if you go by Gerald Celente's prediction of the state of America by 2012, Aaron and I are just ahead of the pack. Lucky us.

Christmas also has been turned back to the bare bones. In our families we drew names instead of buying for everyone. We're also doing a gift exchange of used DVD's. Aaron and I agreed to not get gifts for each other (although, I won't be able to stand it and I'll have to at least make him something). Lucky for us, Everett has no idea what Christmas is and if things are still not up to par next year at least he'll be at the age to be perfectly happy playing with a cardboard box. (hopefully not the one we'll be living in...)

This is strange to me. It's almost Christmas and my tree is only half decorated. There is no holiday hustling and bustling. I haven't stepped foot in a store to buy anything. It almost seems like that's where my getting into the "Christmas Spirit" comes from. I know I'm supposed to focus on Christ at Christmas, and I do...but the presents sure are fun!! This year it had to be different. So, instead of moping about like I have been for the last few days, I gave myself a hearty smack across the face and woke myself up out of my pity party. Off to work I went getting myself interested in Christmas.

On went the painfully cheesy Christmas music I love so much, I baked a loaf of yummy bread and made a batch of wassail, the house smelled terrific. I went to work decorating the house.

We can't afford our usual real tree this year, my brother and sis-in-law were nice enough to let us borrow an extra tree they had. At night Moe, Everett and I went for a walk around the neighborhood and counted all the houses with lights and enjoyed the awesome scent of people having fires in their fireplaces. When we got home I turned off all the lights, lit a bunch of candles and Everett and I watched "The Grinch". I definitely felt better.

Last week I took some photos of Everett for Christmas. Thanks to digital, taking photos doesn't cost me a thing. I had a great time with my little angel. He's so dang cute and has such a sweet presence about him. I'm so happy to be his mom.

Being a grump about our financial situation doesn't help and isn't useful. I know we're not the only ones in this sinking financial boat. Everyone gets their turn in the dumps and right now, it's just ours. Things will get better (hopefully soon) and I will just have to put on a smile and look for the positive until then. Prayers are being answered along the way and my testimony is getting stronger. When I come out on the other side of this mess I will know I needed the experience, no life story is interesting without struggle or opposition.

We are going to have a great story.